To have kids or not to have kids… That is the question

In this generation I feel that most people from the ages or 20-30 are having less kids and they’re making that choice on their own. Wanna know why? Because dogs are a lot easier. But in all reality kids are expensive and a life long commitment. It’s not like they turn 18 and then you’re done, because let’s be real, that’s not how it works. The ages and stages of kids is so expensive. After doing a little research I found this amazing site that can individually calculate the cost of having a child. Curious, give it a try. https://www.babycenter.com/cost-of-raising-child-calculator

Let’s start from the very beginning.  Doctors appointments, unless you have really great insurance you can be paying boo-koo bucks to see a doctor every few weeks. After that 9 months is over come delivery, ouch. To both you and your pockets. But that bundle of joy will be worth it.  Crossing your fingers that a baby shower has provided you with enough essentials and more than enough diapers. Then come the terrible two’s, the traumatizing three’s and the fucking four’s. At least that’s what the parents at the daycare call the stages. Up until school age, kids would be in need of care. Would day care be the type of care that you’re looking for? Or would you be a stay at home parent possibly living off of one income? Maybe you have relatives that can help out. These are all things to consider. Keep in mind that infant programs tend to be the most expensive out of all the programs. (Toddler, preschool and after school) That brings us to the next stage in life, school age. At this point your little one is growing quick, that means a little more food, clothes that will fit for a few months, and transportation. All of these things will gradually go up in the years to come. All in all, you can be looking at anywhere from 9,000-13,000 per year. Every household is different with different incomes but its definitely something to consider when talking with your spouse about bringing a life into this world.

Besides all the money there are other things to consider as well. Ladies this is your body we’re talking about here. Having a child is a beautiful process and the after affects are nothing to be ashamed of! Many ladies develop stretch marks or hold on to a little bit of baby weight. But those stretch lines are more like tiger stripes showing how strong you are! Be proud! But keep in mind that your body will change, and guys, the same thing goes for you. Your woman is about to or is currently putting her body though an enormous process, give her a foot rub and tell her she’s beautiful because she is. A few months down the road, after the labor is over it’ll all be worth it. Try to catch up on some sleep beforehand because you will be waking up every few hours. This is something I have to keep in mind personally because I treasure my sleep more then anything. If you have a week stomach good luck changing those diapers or cleaning up a blow-out. If you don’t know what a blow out it, do not google it. Just ask a mom… teething is somewhat similar to a puppy, they will want to chew on everything, do not let them chew on everything. Sleep patterns will change and will feel more like a roller-coaster then anything else so buckle up. Nap time will be your best friend whether it’s cleaning the house, doing some work, eating a meal or taking a nap yourself. At school age that’s where things get interesting because it’s not just your kid any more its your kid interacting with the world and I gotta say it’s a weird place to be right now. Not every kid is nice, and your kids may even pick up on some not so desirable behaviors. Take a deep breath, these are going to be growing pain years. They will develop into their own personalities but to do that they need to experiment to find who they are. This is really hard for most parents. They want that sweet little baby back… (que baby #2) before you know it there’s a pre-teen living in your house, they eat everything and are always on the move. Get a good look at them now because teenagers are never home. Their calling card is an empty fridge. They may hang out with weird people and date even stranger people but that’s part of the process.  Da-ta-da-da Congratulations you now have an 18-year-old, a full adult. Just kidding they’re gonna live with you a little while longer. In today’s financial world it’s close to impossible for anyone that young to go out on their own, and if they do venture out be prepared to have them come home. Do not give their room to their younger sibling. If you’re going to help them go through college I hope you’ve been saving from the very beginning or they end up with a scholarship. Student debt is no joke.

We want to give our kids the best life possible, so think it over before bringing a life into the world. It’s natural for our maternal instincts to kick in and want to have babies. But this is something that needs to be thought about, over and over. Not only financially but emotionally, physically, and unselfishly.

Valentine’s Day Scavenger Hunt

Alright this one is for all you out there who dread Valentine’s Day!  Such a loving day should not come with any stress but some fun and enjoyment instead. With this being said, it’s sometimes hard to come up with that perfect something for our significant others. So, let’s get brainstorming.

This year particularly has been kind of tough on all of our wallets and I don’t think either one of us is gonna go all out, that doesn’t mean we aren’t gonna have a good time though.  Soooooo this Valentine’s Day I’m gonna send my boyfriend on a scavenger hunt! Now, we are both foodies and we tend to be pretty punny, sometimes a little bit too much, however I’m gonna take full advantage of that. For those of you who have not done a scavenger hunt its very simple, you give the person the first clue, they then proceed to search for the second one. Once they find the second clue it leads them to the third and so one and so forth. For my scavenger hunt I will be placing a punny treat with all of his next clues.

For example, each item will have a clue to where the next present or goodies are hidden. By the end of the hunt he will have had lots of yummy treats and a fun dinner to make together ending with a in home movie night. Yes, dinner and a movie, but with a twist!

  1. You’re all that and a bag of chips (His favorite chips in the pantry)
  2. We make the perfect pair or you knock my socks off! (Super warm work socks in his draw)
  3. You’re such a stud muffin (Local bakery’s muffin in the breakfast area)
  4. I’m totally nuts about you! (His favorite nuts in his lunch box)
  5. I won the lottery when I met you! $$$ (One or two lotto tickets in his wallet or jacket pocket)
  6. Out of all the fish in the sea I’m glad you chose me! (His favorite kind of goldfish, placed in a cabinet)
  7. Donut you know I love you a Hole bunch!?! Or I Donut know what I’d do without you! (His favorite donuts or donut holes hidden where ever you keep baked goods, we keep ours in the oven ((air tight-ish))
  8. You float my boat! (Root beer in fridge, ice cream in freezer)
  9. I just can’t reese- ist you (Reese’s peanut butter cups, hidden in my not so hidden chocolate stash…) and or..
  10. I love you to pieces. (Reese’s Pieces, again hidden in my not so hidden chocolate stash…)
  11. You make my heart pop! You butter stay in my life. 😉 (popcorn in the microwave)
  12. Action and adventure, they all sound fun, anime or comedy lets pic one! (Movies at home)
  13. Will you be my Valentine or is that too cheesy? (Pizza supplies set aside in the fridge)

With the last clue being wherever you choose, have a nice heart felt card to go along with your sweet activities.

I hope anyone who plans on having a scavenger hunt has as much fun as us. If anyone has any comments, suggestions or wants to share their experience please feel free to leave a comment below. 😊

25 ways to De-Stress

Anyone else have those days where things don’t seem to go right? I mean who hasn’t slept through an alarm, or had their car defroster not work, just to find out you get to stay an extra hour and a half at work. Well that was my morning. Now, my schedule is constantly changing and I understand that shit happens and we just need to make the most of it. Today I got to do a 7:30-11 and then go back from 1-6. So, during this break of mine, rather than be upset about all the things that went wrong this morning and how stressful work was, I decided to change it. I can’t change the past but I can change the here and now. The first thing that came to my mind was to make a list of all the good things that had happened today.

  • I managed to stick a bagel in my pocket before running out the door.
  • I have an extremely short commute
  • I didn’t get into an accident although I couldn’t see clearly out my windows.
  • I got an extra hour and a half of work… money makes me happy.
  • I get this extended break to go home, let my pup out and have a decent lunch.

now that I’ve taken all the negatives and turned them into positives I’d like to share a few ideas that may help you de-stress as well.

  1. Take a deep breath, it’s gonna be okay
  2. Try some yoga, or if you’re like me and don’t know yoga just stretch
  3. Play with a pet
  4. Journal, blog, write it down in a diary. Get it out of your mind and onto some paper
  5. Use some oil diffusers, I’m literally using lavender in my dehumidifier right now
  6. Make yourself your favorite healthy snack so you can have as much as you want
  7. Make yourself your favorite drink, preferably nonalcoholic. Best not to start a bad habit there. So, example: hot cocoa, lemonade, tea, smoothie or milkshake
  8. Disconnect, turn off your phone or any other electronic devices
  9. Be active! Anything to get your blood pumping
  10. Get some fresh air, go for a walk or run if you’re into that. Heck, lay out in the sun and get some vitamin D
  11. Work in or visit a garden
  12. Craft away! I personally love to crochet
  13. Do a puzzle
  14. Read a book
  15. Watch a movie or tv show
  16. Cook a fabulous meal
  17. Talk it out, call a friend or family member. Even reach out to a professional if necessary
  18. Color in one of those stress-free coloring books
  19. Listen to some of your favorite music and start dancing!
  20. Cleaning, or house chores to keep your mind busy. Cleansing your house can cleanse your mind.
  21. Take a shower or a bath
  22. Volunteer somewhere
  23. Try something new: a sport, hobby, craft
  24. Make some lists of the things your thankful for, of the things you love, of the people who love you
  25. Make a list of dreams and steps to getting there